Pansy Scheme

from by Schmaltz

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This song was on the fast-track to becoming the pride o' the farm until the hard drive that stored the multi-track stems went belly-up. So we're left with this incomplete rough mix. Backup buttercup!


We’re in a time of glacial drift, an ice-age if you will
Where cheese is what it takes to please the masses down the hill
It’s slowed its roll down to a crawl, but now it threatens to freeze us all
Cheese not like when it came as a wheel, as a slice, in a can, in a ball

We’re in a time of flash mob rule, where any public group of dancing fools
Can convince the rest that cheese is cool
I know what it is you’re likely to say, “I don’t care what you think, I like it that way”
That sense of social synchronicity, The seeming spontaneity
The feeling of spiritual connectivity, The gleeful cheer,
The gaiety
And after the dance you can be romanced by a Kardashian in her underpants

Carry on about your cheese-wheel-chill, I’m sure your own selections will thrill you much more
We’ve got nothing better that can get you any wetter than Snookee & the Sitch on the Jersey Shore
But we take pride in our pissing on your parade, the processions of depression all the networks made
Speaking of “piss”, a new genre’s come out; a new designation leaves our nation little doubt
That I may be fucked as you can clearly see,
But at least I’m not as fucked up as these assholes on TV.


from 2 + 2 = Chicken, released November 24, 2013
Words by Mike Watson. Music by Mike Watson, K.c. Dalton, Barney Firks, Dion Thurman.


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